Know when to walk away, know when to run

Parenting is a learning experience. A lot of parental education is formal, grounded in sound advice from other moms and books by supposed experts. But most of it is more like guerrilla warfare. You do what you have to, when you have to, to keep yourself and those around you alive to see another day. Some days, it's like living in a perpetual state of survival mode.

Today was one of those days.

We had everything necessary for a text book potty training experience. Delicious treats? Check. Big girl panties? Check. Singing potty chair? Check. Books to keep the potty trainee occupied? Check. I'd read Pottywise cover to cover, and reviewed the key points. Abby exhibited all the right signs of potty readiness. I knew it wouldn't be easy, but with some helpful advice from my friends and Drs. Ezzo and Bucknam, I was ready to dive in.

It took about thirty minutes for me to begin losing hope, and another eight hours for me to lose all motivation and give up entirely. Oh, Abby's ready all right. I, on the other hand, am not.

I was not prepared to chase a highly active 22 month old in big girl panties around the house waiting for her to pee. I was not prepared to spend my day in 15 minute increments, alternating between trying to keep her close to the potty and trying to keep her on the potty. I was not prepared to be peed on while racing my child's full bladder from the playroom to the bathroom. I was not prepared for just how exhausting potty training really is.

It was a long day, and to say it was frustrating is a bit of an understatement. But somewhere in the midst of the madness, I found a moment to open a book to the following passage:

"'All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be' (Psalm 139:16). 'Days ordained for me' refers not only to the length of my life but to all the events and circumstances of each day....when something happens that tends to frustrate me, I...say to God, 'This circumstance is part of Your plan for my life today. Help me to respond in faith and in a God-honoring way to Your providential will. And then please give me wisdom to know how to address the situation that tends to cause the frustration.'"

--Jerry Bridges, Respectable Sins

So the truth is, God is sovereign over every part of my life, including my failed attempts at potty training. He knew the details of this trying day long before potty training ever crossed my mind, and today He met me right where I was and showed me He was sufficient to get me through it. I spent a lot of time talking to Him today (pleading really) and as I resolved myself to the fact that we would not be succeeding this week, I realized something. It does not matter if we potty train today, or in a month, or in a year. What matters is that my daily activities, my attitudes, my priorities, and the way I interact with my family bring honor to my heavenly Father, and that they work together to point my children to Him, the only perfect parent.

If our parenting doesn't point our children to their need for Christ, no little successes along the way--pottywise or otherwise--will really matter.